Random Thoughts

Being a woman is a complex process. Our journey of womanly discovery is both light and airy AND dark and mysterious. As women. we are constantly bombarded with rules, perceptions, and impressions about womanhood; so much so, that finding our way is often elusive. When I tally the things that I know for sure about being a woman, most of what I know has come from other women. My grandmother used to say: “Women sharpen women.” She meant that in its broadest sense: the older woman’s knowledge sharpens the younger woman, the younger woman’s innovation discourages the older woman’s surrender, the mistress sharpens the wife.

In this section, I want to share some of my random thoughts on womanhood. And invite guest commentators to share theirs as well.


9 responses to “Random Thoughts

  • pattypinner

    When a new man comes into your life, what are the most important preparations you make to begin the journey. For example, I always seem to check my linen closet and my lingerie drawer. What do you do?

  • deanie814

    I always call my helper, the cleaning lady, immediately.

  • Jaci June

    First thing I think of is what I will potentially cook for him when he comes to dinner. Second thing I use are natural and subtle fragrances. I find that when I where a little lavender oil on my neck and wrists both men and women comment on my “fresh, sweet scent.” I also like burts bees body lotions like “milk and honey,” it really does smell as good as it sounds! Whatever the case I think smell is a very primal and important thing in human relations. I’m not a big fan of women or men dousing themselves in loud, artificial perfumes and deodorants. I like to think of making myself smell more like the soft sweet aromas that come out of my oven when I’m baking a dessert. 😉

  • pattypinner

    Jaci, we are kindred spirits. What I will potentially cook for a new man is something I also enjoy listing and planning. I imagine, to a “modern” non-cooking woman, this must sound pretty archaic. The way I see it, feeding a man is one of the most intimate aspects of courtship. When used correctly, cooking for a man can be used as a “tool” in a relationship…food soothes, inspires, says I’m sorry, and ultimately, that I love you. (of course, you can’t open your oven door for every man that comes along:)).

  • deanie814

    HI ladies!
    I totally get it…cooking can be a wonderful expression of a range of sentiments. While it isn’t the first thing I think of, eventually I have to cook too. Since this is a “big deal” for me, I start out small, casual..kind of easy-breezy. I would appreciate hearing new ideas that I could adapt to fit my style of femininity. What a great blog this is…!

  • pattypinner

    hi deanie. thanks for stopping by. i’ve been away for a while, tending to other areas of my life. I really think a woman SHOULD start out small with a new man; give herself time to “learn him” as my mother would say. Besides, some men are notorious for “eating and running”. Which reminds me of an incident I experienced some years back—I had met what I thought was the “perfect catch”. The guy was a handsome and articulate police officer that I met at a funeral in Detroit (Mama had reservations from the start; said police officers are too suspicious to make good boyfriends). Anyway, I believed this guy had potential–he was a little bit conservative, and a little bit “street” (just the way I like my men). So, after a few lengthy conversations on the phone, I invited him to drive up for dinner.

    Truth told, I spent a small fortune on that meal — filet mignon, carmelized mushrooms, sauteed fresh spinach, cheesy Yucon Gold potatoes, my grandmother’s apple pie, and a nice bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon. At the appointed time, I set my table with my nicest table-top trinkets, and arranged my dinner so that it looked warm and inviting. Then, I dolled up and sat down to wait…I waited, and waited, and WAITED.

    A few hours late, what I hoped was my future husband, knocked on the door. And like Mama said, he sauntered inside, looking around as though he’d just entered a crime scene. Long story short, he sat down and gobbled up my food as though it was the best food he’d ever eaten. In fact, I think he said so, a couple of times. A short while later, he pushed away from the table, and said he had something to tell me. He said, “I started not to come. While you seem like a sweet girl, I really shouldn’t be here. I have a girlfriend that I love VERY much. In fact, we’re engaged.” Young or old, white or black, if you’re a woman, I know you know how I felt.

    I said all this to say, I’ve learned to go slow with a man–in a new relationship and in one that’s a few years old. I think too often, we skip the teasing phase, and jump right into the real deal. Now, when I’m cooking for a new guy, I go with “finger food” first.

  • deanie814

    Hi Patty,
    I like your suggestion of finger food because this would be perfect when the invitation to watch a game or a movie is extended. However, the “wings, celery sticks with blue cheese dip” is so tired! I hope someone posts with a new twist on the perfect finger food…the big game is coming!

  • Chanel

    Hello, I’m married and I don’t have any comments on the current topic but I want you to know someone in Dallas is in the room supporting the female cause. (smile)

  • Elizabeth Parker (EPWendell LLC)

    Ramdom Thoughts – I’m a great cook and love it. But my passion is centered on helping the family learn how to obtain a Financial Healthy way of life that will last them a life time. Keep cooking LIZ

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